Taking My Place (Part 1 – Titus 2:3-5)
December 1, 2025
Two significant things happened this year. I retired after 40 years in the workplace. The other was my mother’s sudden going home to the Lord, just 18 months after Dad suddenly passed away. She was 88 years old. Last spring, she told me she was sure my sister Ruth and my dad were having fun in heaven without her. She was ready to go, but I was not.
Four generations.
Mom was the matriarch of the family for all my life. It was easy for me to pretend I was still “young” because my mother was still around. Now she is gone, and I am a little uncomfortable with the idea that I am now the “older” generation. Sure, I have been a grandmother for years. Sure, I am retired from a long career. Sure, I am sporting gray hair, eyeglasses, and hearing aids. But now, I can’t pretend anymore. What does this new role of older woman entail?
I went to the Bible to look for any instruction that might tell me what the role should be. And guess what? St. Paul had something to say about the role of the older woman. In his discussion of the conduct of church leaders and their families, St. Paul writes to Titus about the ideal behavior of older women.
3 Bid the older women similarly to be reverent and devout in their deportment as becomes those engaged in sacred service, not slanderers or slaves to drink. They are to give good counsel and be teachers of what is right and noble, 4 So that they will wisely train the young women to be sane and sober of mind (temperate, disciplined) and to love their husbands and their children, 5 To be self-controlled, chaste, homemakers, good-natured (kindhearted), adapting and subordinating themselves to their husbands, that the word of God may not be exposed to reproach (blasphemed or discredited). (Titus 2:3-5 AMPC)
There is certainly a lot to unpack in these three verses but stay with me. My first thought was that I probably have a little work to do on that deportment thing. But what I want to center up on is that older women are to give good counsel, to teach what is right and noble. Some of this counseling and teaching is a natural part of a mother-daughter relationship, but this scripture is not limiting this counseling/teaching role of older women to just our own daughters or daughters-in-law. Paul says it is a responsibility we have toward all young women in our faith communities.
I recently lead a bible study for a women’s group and was pleased to see four different generations of women there. My goal is always to make sure I engage young girls and their young mothers and not just relate to my generation. Even if the younger ones don’t say anything, they are listening. When older women share personal struggles or experiences, this is part of that counseling. When we are admitting what we did wrong and how we recovered from it, that is the teaching. Luckily, being older, I can let my young listeners think these stories are from decades ago, and I don’t have to admit that this failure just happened last week.
If we older women can curb the desire to take over the conversation, give unsolicited advice and just listen, the opportunity to share an insight will come up. We of the older generation also generally have more time than the young women who have children at home. Use this time to read the Bible and dive into other faith-edifying media. In doing this, we are enriching ourselves and at the same time becoming better prepared to share a godly perspective that encourages and edifies the young women around us.
Prayer: Lord, I am leaning into the role of a wise woman who can effectively teach and counsel the younger women around me. Prompt me to listen and stop me from making every conversation about me and what I know. Show me how to be an encourager and to demonstrate Your love wherever I can to those around me. Thank you that You have an important role for me as I get older and move into the next phase in my life. I ask this is Jesus’ name. Amen.