To Love Husband and Children (Part 4 – Titus 2:3-5)
December 23, 2025
With the passing of my mother, I am now the “older” generation in my family. I am exploring my new role as an older woman by digging further into what St. Paul wrote to Titus about the conduct and responsibility of older women.
3 Similarly, exhort the older women to be reverent in their behavior, not to be slanderous or slaves of drink, and eager to teach what is good. 4 They can then instruct the younger women to love their husbands and their children, 5 to be self-controlled and chaste, to be diligent homemakers, to be agreeable, and to respect the authority of their husbands so that the word of God may not be derided. (Titus 2:3-5 NCB)
In the United States of America, we place a high value on marrying for love. It is very romantic. However, we are not so far removed from arranged marriages or marriages for convenience that were common in the USA up until the late 1800s. Until that time, a marriage for convenience was considered a survival strategy. Nowadays we view arranged marriages as abuse of young women and girls, and that does certainly happen. But sadly, marrying for love doesn’t prevent spousal abuse either.
Even in an arranged marriage, romance wasn’t completely dead. The husband and wife expected and hoped that romantic love and friendship would come along later. And this leads us to St Paul’s statement that older women need to teach young women to love their husbands and children. We all know Romantic love doesn’t have a great track record of solid loving relationships. With the divorce rate of 40-50% in the USA, instruction on how to love your husband and children is still valuable. Being one of those divorce statistics myself, I could have used some wise counsel, and I should have asked for guidance long before my first marriage reached the breaking point.
Early fireworks of romantic love do not last, so let’s dig deeper into scriptures to find the kind of love that does last. If we, as older women, are blessed enough to experience a lasting love ourselves, we can counsel others. The highest type of lasting love is Agape love. It is the love that God has for us and the love that flows through us if we are Christians. The Bible says in 1 John 4:16 that God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him. When we became Christians, the God who is love comes to live in our hearts. We have God’s love inside us. This is important because that love of God flowing through us is available for us to use to love our husbands and children.
No man has at any time [yet] seen God. But if we love one another, God abides (lives and remains) in us and His love (that love which is essentially His) is brought to completion (to its full maturity, runs its full course, is perfected) in us! (1 John 4:12 AMPC)
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 describes how love acts. Even when we don’t feel like being loving, this is how we are to act. Fortunately, we have God’s love flowing through our own spirits and we can tap into that love, rather then trying to generate it all on our own!
4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. (NLT)
Regarding loving our children, the Bible indicates that a mother is to have compassion toward their children as God the Father has compassion on us. Jesus says in Luke 6:36 that toward people who do not deserve it, we are to be merciful (sympathetic, tender, responsive, and compassionate) even as your Father is [all these].
Going through old boxes of things recently, I found the program from my first wedding. The cover picture and the quote was from Ecclesiastes 4:12 – A threefold cord is not easily broken. The idea was that the marriage should have three parties – the man, the woman, and God. The actual quote from Ecclesiastes 4:12 is A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken (NLT). The sentiment is good, but unfortunately the implementation was lacking. We initially invited God into our marriage, but unfortunately, we did not actively keep Him there as the years wore on.
The most important thing that I have learned and could share with young women is loving your husband and children will come when you prioritize the development of your faith in Jesus Christ and in God. This opens the door to access the love of God that you can then use for all your earthly relationships. Go to God, the source of love, to obtain the love you need. In Mark 12, the priority is plainly laid out for us.
29 Jesus answered, “The first is: ‘Hear, O Israel: the Lord our God, the Lord is one! 30 You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ 31 The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” (NCB)
Prayer: Lord, let my life be an example of Your love for others to see. Today, I tap into the love You have for me and for those around me. Show me how to use Your love to love my family and those around me. Your love for me is a great blessing. I thank you for it and I commit to passing it on, even when I don’t feel like it. I love because You first loved me. Amen.